What’s a Girl To Do?
Posted: May 27, 2011 Filed under: Fine Art, Working Life, YIOM, Yoga Culture, YogaTunes | Tags: bat for lashes, what's a girl to do, YIOM, yoga music Leave a commentI get territorial about music. I’m a firm believer that nothing is any good if everyone likes it, yet I’m quick to jump back from obscure-for-obscurity’s sake hipster junk food. This lady, Bat for Lashes, strikes the perfect balance. She’s brilliant during a yoga practice. Her music dredges up that mysterious, witchy-woman vibe that we don’t always get to play with. You know, all sidelong glances and shit.
But please don’t steal her from me and make her a big star.
The Art of Home Practice
Posted: May 15, 2011 Filed under: #365yoga, Vegetarian, Work Life Balance, Working Life, YIOM, Yoga, Yoga Culture, YogaTunes | Tags: home practice, yoga at home, yoga class, yoga music, yoga props, yoga sequencing 13 Comments
Originally, I’d intended to write this post about the home practice blues. When you’d rather stay on the couch than unroll your mat. When you have dinner to make (and you’re hungry). When you worked late last night and can’t find the energy to get up early and squeeze in a practice before rushing back to work. Home practice can be a challenge just to fit into your schedule – and this is supposed to be easier than getting to a studio class!
If you create a beautiful space, have your props on hand, cue up some tunes, (and forgive yourself when you don’t have the yoga in you), you can develop a home practice. I started my home practice because studio classes were too expensive and inconvenient. I get to class once or twice a week and try to keep up my home practice another two or three days. Like everything else, it’s a balance.
Here are my tips for developing a satisfying home practice.
Set up a sacred space. Well, ‘sacred’ is subjective. I practice in the living room because that’s where I feel most comfortable. I tried the logical places: my office or the finished basement, but it just never felt right. I like to be where the action is, where the big windows are, where the fireplace is, on hardwood flooring, etc. Find a space in your home where it feels right. You might search for a space with a hard floor and an empty wall. Don’t give up – try new spaces if the most obvious ones don’t work.
Have your props ready to go. It’s a good excuse to say, “Well, I can’t practice Revolved Triangle because I don’t have the blocks I need.” Not good enough though. Get yourself the basics: 2 blocks, 1 strap, 1-2 Mexican blankets, and a mat. Keep them out in plain sight, not hidden where you’ll forget about them.
Amuse yourself. When I’m setting out for a serious practice, I’ll put on music or work it out in silence. Check out my Top Ten Sexy Yoga Tunes. But if I’m just interested in fifteen minutes of quick sun salutations before dinner, I’ll admit to practicing in front of the TV. I know, y’all hardcore yogis are gonna be pissed, but it’s the truth. Roseanne, Trailer Park Boys, Parks and Recreation, AbFab, 30 Rock, whatever. True, you should embrace silence and use pranayama to stabilize your breath, but it’s YOUR home practice. Do whatever works to get you practicing. Also, the consistent, glowing telly makes rolling off the couch and onto your mat a little easier.
OK, you got your space, your props and your tunes. Now what? If you’ve never had a home practice, it can be hard taking what you know from class and applying it all by yourself. That can be remedied by doing A LOT of yoga in classes. Eventually you’ll learn what sequences you like and you’ll have a mental encyclopedia of go-to poses ready to pull from. Plus, you’ll understand alignment so you can keep yourself safe when you practice at home. Some people like using yoga videos to bridge this gap (lots of people seem to like Shiva Rae’s videos), but they’re not for me. Books are more my style. I like Gary Kraftsow’s sequencing in Yoga for Transformation. And you can do what my teacher Tom does and just try to cram as many poses from Light on Yoga as you can into an hour and a half. Web-wise, there’s a new crop of sites providing online video yoga classes, some with well-known teachers. Yogaglo is one of the best. Since I’m a total Type A, here’s my nerdy yoga organizational secret: I keep a three-ring binder with clear page sleeves filled with sequencing, pose breakdowns, target area exercises (core work!), poems, mantras, articles, photos of beloved teachers, etc. I tear out the “Home Practice” section from Yoga Journal magazine, or print out stuff I like from the internet. It all goes in the binder, which I keep right at the top of my mat during practice. This keeps my asana flowing. When I finish one pose, I know exactly where I’m going next. I don’t need it called out.
Give yourself Savasana. Don’t skimp on Savasana (or any pose) because you know you can get away with it. In class or at home, yoga is not about competition or achievement. It’s about love. And sitting with what’s uncomfortable, even when it sucks. Try not to shortchange your breath, even in a challenging pose. Keep your holds as long as you can. In class, you’d keep that hold – why shouldn’t you at home?
Practicing at home brings yoga into your personal life. Your husband walks by when you’re in Wheel. You have to move framed art off the wall to work your Handstand. You have this amazing opportunity to listen to your body’s wisdom. It’s like eavesdropping on the natural universe, and at home, you can keep yourself even more grounded. Relinquish the need for external approval. Free from criticism (or flattery), you can practice freely and cultivate witnessing awareness. Take with you only what you need. And relax, ’cause you’re at home.
What are your secrets for a successful home practice? Any sequencing resources you care to share?
How to Piss Off a Chef
Posted: April 24, 2011 Filed under: Animal Friends, culinary culture, Uncategorized, vegan, Vegetarian, Working Life | Tags: justin johnson, professional chef, St. Louis, vegan, vegetarian cuisine 5 CommentsA Vegetarian’s Questions for a Professional Chef
My best friend makes my favorite food. Deceptively simple flavor profiles, lots of comfort. Justin and I have known each other since high school. We met in a graphic design class and right away I knew he was an awesome weirdo like me. Almost immediately it was a brother-sister friendship. Many funky parties ended with Justin in the kitchen, half drunk, trying to make something tasty from whatever was left over. I remember lots of creative omelets and pastas. Once at a restaurant, Justin had a pasta dish with a really unique sauce of pureed broccoli, garlic, olive oil and cheese. He went right home to duplicate it. One of his great inventions is using coconut milk in mashed potatoes.
By the time we grew up and were able to appreciate really fine food, we had moved in opposite directions. Now I’m on the East Coast and Justin’s in the Midwest, but we still talk food. I turned out to be a vegetarian yogini and he’s a meat-loving chef. I was wondering what chefs think about vegetarians, so I asked Justin.
YSTD: How would you describe your food?
JJ: It’s a regional hodgepodge. I lean towards the rustic foods of Italy, France, and the Mediterranean. I constantly cook for my family so there’s lots of crowd-pleasing pasta. Even these daily dishes are carefully prepared – I really enjoy a slow braise when I have the time. I usually serve my meals with homemade bread and a simple dessert.
YSTD: How does living in St. Louis influence your cuisine?
JJ: Well I have to say there’s a lot of meat out here, so amazing produce can fly under the radar. As a chef, it’s fun to cycle through produce as the seasons and menus change. In terms of cuisine, St. Louis has a surprising variety. We have great neighborhoods with awesome Vietnamese and Thai restaurants. We have a big Italian district (where I work) which covers the culinary spectrum of north to south Italy pretty damn well. The pizza and eggs in the south; the cured meats of Tuscany; the risotto of the north – all in St. Louis.
YSTD: Where/how do you source the best produce/ingredients?
JJ: Whenever I get the chance, I love to get down to the farmer’s markets and actually meet the growers. These guys will tell you everything about how they grow their produce, but only if you ask. You can really tell some of these guys have a passion for it too. My favorite farm market is next to a great micro-brewery, and one of the guys with the best veggies you’ve ever seen will sit on the back of his truck gnawing on a raw chunk of bok choy. No supermarket can deliver that.
YSTD: What do you think when diners request meat-free versions of menu items? Does it piss you off?
JJ: Not especially, unless they ask me to create a dish that isn’t up to standards in terms of flavor. Nothing worse than being in a busy kitchen and someone orders a dish with no salt, pepper, butter, meat, fish, cream or oil. I have had this request many times over the years. Simple tips for special diners: don’t make up your own dish when ordering, and don’t order something at my restaurant that you’ve had somewhere else. These are things that make us chefs angry. As chefs we know how to make something good. We can deal with health and allergy issues, but be reasonable.
YSTD: What do you think of the vegan diet? How about “raw” food?
JJ: I don’t disapprove of a vegan diet, but personally I love cooking my proteins too much. I can’t think of what I would do if I couldn’t hear the sear of a good scallop or a portion of fresh tuna. Raw food? My job would be pretty useless once people learn how to cut their own veggies…
YSTD: What’s “macro-biotic” food? Give us an example.
JJ: Macro is all about simple grains and local fruits and vegetables. That’s it. This could be a simple quinoa pilaf with local leeks and some lightly dressed greens. Lentils, beans and tofu are the main sources of protein, but they’re used sparingly.
YSTD: Can vegetarians really know good food? How about vegans?
JJ: I think anyone can know good food if they are open to learning about it. Being open to trying new flavors, styles, and cooking techniques will really pave the road for anyone who wants to get into good food. I also recommend gardening for anyone who wants to know their food better. It’s a great way to see what goes into the growth process and you’ll have pride of ownership. Plus, it saves a bunch of money at the store.
YSTD: What’s your most popular meat-free entrée?
JJ: At work, it’s a whole wheat pasta with sautéed veggies (zucchini, squash, broccoli, roasted cauliflower, and tomato) cooked with olive oil and lots of garlic, topped with fresh herbs and toasted pine nuts. At home, no one can beat my vegetable ragout. Whatever I have on hand I turn into a fragrant stew to serve over my famous fluffy mashed potatoes.
YSTD: Which chefs do you like?
JJ: I’m a big Tony Bourdain fan. His books paint a great picture of the industry culture and of the different people that wander in and out of the kitchen. I also like Jacques Pepin. I enjoy how he really tries to impart the value of his years of apprenticeship.
YSTD: Most memorable meal?
JJ: There is an amazing restaurant in Maui that will blow any food lover’s mind. It’s called Mama’s Fish House. It’s a model for using the freshest, most authentic ingredients, like day boat fish. Add to that the most impeccable service I have ever had, plus a gorgeous view of the Pacific Ocean – nothing’s better.
Justin Johnson is a classically trained chef, specializing in Italian cusine and expert seafood preparation. While working as a Sous Chef at a popular Italian restaurant in St. Louis, Justin also teaches cooking workshops and is developing a private clientele. His mother, wife and best friend continue to nag him to open his own food truck.
Just Words
Posted: March 25, 2011 Filed under: Aging, guest post, Poetry, Working Life, Yoga Culture | Tags: Buddhist, Geof Hewitt, Just Worlds, modern american poetry Leave a commentSince I’m on holiday, I figured I’d let the poets run the show over at Yoga Saves the Day. Here’s two by a deep dude, Geof Hewitt.
In Sadness
In sadness I started for a place
I had hoped to avoid,
a place I’d branched away from
ten years earlier and had to re-track.
Ten years of backtracking I hated myself
for the twenty years I had wasted,
until at the souces of my sadness
I realized the only years wasted
were those spent hating myself.
Loving myself for that discovery,
I forgave the years spent hating.
Blithering proud, I started down
the same wrong path again.
Typographical Errors
Don’t let them bother you, she said.
After all, those are just worlds.
Many Things to Tell You
Posted: March 24, 2011 Filed under: Aging, Poetry, Working Life | Tags: aging, modern american poetry, natural poetry, poetry by seniors 1 Comment
The following poems are from “Many Things to Tell You, Natural Poetry by People Living in Nursing Homes” compiled by Tom Heinzen.
That Corner is So Empty Now
Anonymous
You know I miss him a little:
That man who died.
It’s nice to have company talking to you.
Whatever he said doesn’t mean a thing:
I think he hated everybody by the end;
He knew he was going to die.
I miss his talking.
He was so disgusted with everything.
That corner is so empty now.
Make Believe
By Andreas Constantinou
(b. 1907; composed 1995)
Make believe
There’s something wonderful
In the other person.
I Try to Pass on Happiness
by Anna Schoeps
(b.1914; composed 1996)
I try to pass on happiness.
I had this beautiful scarf –
It had all different kinds of birds
All different colors
All around the border.
I knew someone would steal it
So I gave it away.
Sometimes I Wonder
by Elizabeth Sheridan
(b.1906; composed 1995)
Sometimes I wonder…
Am I really in charge of myself?
Don’t think about it too much.
It might not be such a good idea.
35 Ways to Deal With Life
Posted: March 13, 2011 Filed under: #365yoga, Animal Friends, Film, Fine Art, Life, Poetry, Travel, Uncategorized, Vegetarian, Working Life, Yoga, Yoga Culture, YogaTunes | Tags: balance, life, purpose, Stress, work, yoga 6 CommentsNumbers 1-16
I’m depressed. I was officially diagnosed about fifteen years ago. I’ve refused “meds” because I don’t want to depend on an unnatural chemical intervention to make me OK. Life is what it is. For me, it’s usually petty, stressful and full of obligations. I’ve come to realize that dealing successfully with life has become a simple mathematical equation. Let’s say life is 80% bad and I get to spend 20% of my time recovering from the bad. I need to value that twenty percent, which means that I can’t only spend it lounging under blankets and stuffing cereal into my mouth straight from the box. Not much of a life when the other eighty percent involves me working long hours at a stressful job.
That twenty percent of “good life” needs to be full of things I really love, things that make life worth living. The more good stuff you add to a bad life, the more balanced life will appear. You can trick yourself into dealing. Depending on your situation, you might not need “meds”. You just have to identify what you love and do it like crazy. Like your life depends on it.
I’m sharing the below list because it might help you. It’s packed with over thirty things that I’ve found make life worth living. (I’ll post numbers 17-35 later this week.) Maybe you’ll learn a new self-soothing technique. Maybe you’ll be reminded to love something you forgot about. Maybe you’ll reconsider loving something.
1. Eat a Big Bowl of Pasta
It’s not the most nutritious thing in the world, but good pasta and good jar sauce is one of the most comforting fast suppers in the world. DeCecco pasta is the best, but Barilla isn’t bad either. Trader Joe’s Arrabbiata or Four Cheese sauces rock. Paul Newman makes an okay jar sauce too. Boil up your pasta and while it’s draining, dump the sauce into the same pot on the still-hot burner. When it gets hot, toss in the hot pasta and you’ve got a nommy one-pot dinner in about 15 minutes. Comfort after a twelve-hour workday.
2. Silence
Some of my happiest moments happened while on silent retreat. Going under the cloak of silence for seven days is a little anxiety-producing at first, but once you release the tight fist of grasping, it becomes divine. You don’t have to go on retreat but you can’t practice silence at a workaday job either. Try silence for a weekend. No computers or television, no cell phones, no talking. If you can stand it, try to cut out music and reading too. Don’t drown yourself out with media and others. Give yourself time to be with yourself. If it’s uncomfortable, don’t give up. Slowly train yourself to sit with what’s uncomfortable. Practice self-inquiry.
3. Sit in Front of a Fireplace
I have achieved one of my lifelong dreams in getting a home with a fireplace and in the cold weather, I use it all the time. I love letting the heat from the fire warm my hamstrings and back before a yoga practice. I loved noticing its happy flickers during the hub-bub of Christmas day. I love turning out the lights and sitting in front of it, just staring. Watching its activity, its energy. Humans have done this for eons for good reason. Let the fire do its thing.
4. Take a Bath
Baths are the best. Especially with Epsom salt and lavender oil. They’re good for your skin. They soothe sore muscles and ease you to sleep. Join me in taking the waters weekly.
5. A Night at the Opera
Over the last couple of years, I’ve realized what a treat it is to go to the opera. I’m lucky to live within driving distance of the Metropolitan Opera in NYC. After a couple of shows, I was hooked. I can actually feel the endorphins flooding my body during an aria sung by a doomed heroine. The opera has it all – rare talents of people at the top of their field mixed with often-surreal, otherworldly scenery, set to the finest music and the poetry of clever librettos. It’s a supreme art form; one of the most beautiful ever created. And it needs your support.
6. Collect Things
I collect Edward Gorey’s books – the originals, many with their jackets. I’d like to start collecting rare books. At the top of my wishlist is a first (or second) printing of L’Histoire de Babar. I also collect tea, butterflies, cardigans, ephemera, and mean bosses.
7. Have a Crutch
Some people get off on power, perfectionism, wine or weed. You got a crutch? Use it. I’m not advocating anything dangerous or unhealthy. We’re just talking about getting through life here. If a glass of red wine gets you to sleep after a stressful day at work, I’m right there with you.
8. Meditate
Meditation is a challenge worth exploring. I admit that I don’t keep a consistent practice, but I can vouch for its effectiveness when I’m on retreat or as part of my yoga practice. I’ve sat blissfully for as long as thirty minutes, and I’ve given up after twenty seconds of fidgeting. The key is training yourself to watch yourself. If you have a thought, acknowledge it, then send it on its way like a leaf in a stream. And breathe.
9. Crochet or Knit
I’m no good at it, but it’s a relaxing, productive way to expend anxious feelings.
10. Make Art
I don’t make nearly as much work as much as I think about making it. Making art’s not for everybody because there can be fear when you’re staring down the blank canvas. Or just scribble. Put your new perspectives to use in a journal. If the US experiences a nation-wide, natural (or unnatural) disaster, we’ll be the first ones to start drawing in the dirt.
11. Cook Your Own Food
Food from out is rarely as good as the food from my own kitchen. If you don’t already know how, learn to cook well for yourself. Cheaper, healthier and usually more delicious because it’s exactly what you want; it’s the gift that keeps on giving.
12. Eat a Cupcake
‘Nuff said. The best ones come from friends.
13. Practice Yoga
I don’t schedule late meetings on Tuesdays. That’s my yoga night and I try hard to maintain that work-life boundary. Yoga makes life worth living. Try it. You’ll be surprised at how strong you are. If you already have a practice, explore trip-hop for your playlist. Bands like Portishead and Massive Attack were practically made for yoga. Also, try the mixes from the Costes brothers’ hotels. (Etage 3 is my favorite.)
14. Buy New Underwear
A reasonable purchase to ease the pain of life.
15. Read David Sedaris
He’s right about everything. I guarantee you will actually laugh out loud.
16. Get to Know Those Less Fortunate
Spending my career at nonprofit organizations has taught me a lot. The most important obstacle for all of them is that not enough people want to learn about the suffering of others. It’s like why people refuse to give up eating meat – they don’t want to know the truth because if they did, they’d have to do something about it. What do you care about? Go and stand with the people who are working to do something about it. The first step is to educate yourself. Then volunteer. Then donate – it doesn’t have to be money. Grassroots nonprofits need your professional skills, if you’re willing to donate them. Are you an accountant, or an HR executive? Are you an IT professional? Nonprofits need your help. Offer it.
Please keep in mind that these are merely offerings – just things that help me deal with living in an imperfect world. I’ll post numbers 17-35 later this week. If you try any of these suggestions, please let me know how it goes.
Dealing with a Job You Hate
Posted: February 8, 2011 Filed under: Life, Work Life Balance, Working Life | Tags: dealing with a job you hate, professional life, work life balance 10 Comments
So you hate your job? Get in line. Recent studies show only 45% of Americans are satisfied with their jobs, a record low. The most popular areas of discontent settle around three areas: 1) the job isn’t interesting, 2) salaries haven’t kept up with inflation, and 3) the deduction of health care costs is too high. You’re in good company, but so what? You’re still, as Matt Groening called it, living in hell.
Ever since I started working, I pretty much hated it. When I was a kid I took on mother’s helper and babysitting jobs, which prepared me for a future of being a petty slave to a superior. As a teenager, I worked at a CVS for ‘escape money’, but dealing with the public was equally hilarious and horrifying. In college, I started to get more interesting jobs in art galleries and nonprofit organizations, in which I eventually built my career. After college I’d tried working at a for-profit company, a commercial real estate developer. Even though that’s where the big money was, it was overwhelmingly shallow (and sexist) drudgery which served a singular purpose: lining the pockets of an already-rich asshole. It was the highest salary I was ever offered. I lasted about two months.
I learned my lesson and have spent the rest of my professional career working for nonprofit organizations. The drama level is at Red Alert all the time, and the burnout rate is through the roof, but at least I can lull myself into believing that I’m helping people who need it.
Of course, I dream of a less stressful, more satisfying job. I’d like to be appreciated and respected. I’d like what the Human Resources Department comically calls a “work – life balance”. I’d like to avoid every 8:30pm meeting I’m asked to attend. None of that’s gonna happen and I know it. Over the years, I’ve dealt with these jobs in various ways. Some of them are listed below for your benefit.
Weigh your options. If you’re crying in your office or being a jerk at home, it’s time to quit. I know, in this economy that’s blasphemy. You won’t get unemployment benefits, and you’ll have to start from scratch at a new job, presuming you can even find a new job. You might want to stay where you are and tough it out a few more months before you snap.
If you are staying put for a while longer, do just enough to get by. You’re protecting your sanity here, so don’t be a hero. Bosses take liberties with their employees all the time – you just have to make sure to take advantage of your own little liberties. For example, if no one is looking and no work is pending, I take off a little early. If you get an hour’s lunch, damnit, take your full hour. Get the hell out of that stuffy cubicle and get some air. Do NOT get there early, work through your lunch, and stay late. Give up the ghost of trying to impress your boss with “face time.”
Most importantly (and this is the only thing getting me through), you must work hard for balance. Because you hate your job so much, you need to add in stuff you like to balance your life out. Forget about your job for a minute. What’s going on in your life? Are you just dragging yourself home, eating whatever’s easiest, and conking out in front of the television? Even though that can feel comforting at the time, it’s only compounding your depression because your life is now revolving entirely around a job you hate. For me, I add in things that calm me and make me happy. During work, I try to do a set a pushups for each hour seated at my desk. After work I practice yoga, or work out my frustrations on a rowing machine. Or I throw on my sneakers and run around my neighborhood. Every night, I make sure to prepare a healthy and delicious dinner, and I make enough to take for lunch so I’m not stuck eating fast-food junk. It’s not always easy, but I do it to stay sane. I’ve also learned that treating myself is most worthwhile when I spend on experiences rather than material goods. I go to the opera, to a silent retreat in Maine, and on annual European vacations. I don’t work for nothing.
In life, we spend more time at work with strangers, than at home with our family and friends. The only thing you have in common with these people is that you were randomly thrown together and are forced to surmount challenges by working as a team. Socially, it’s an unrealistic expectation. Professionally, it’s futile. Emotionally, it’s stressful and ultimately depressing. But you CAN take steps to protect your family life, your mental health and your sense of self. Deal with your job, complain away, but don’t let it beat you.
How do you get through your day at a job you hate? What do you “add in” to create a real work-life balance?
Yoga Saves the Day 